Lose Weight Now. Ask Me How.
After having the Spam-a-Lot Weekend, I had the chance to really think about the damage potted meat products can do to a person's well being, and pant size...After two of these by-product meals, I really thought I could feel my arteries squeezing the congealed pork.
It almost felt like this.
Then, I got to thinking...The tabloids are plastered with scrawny waifish starlets like Lindsay Lohan
Mary Kate and Nicole Ritchie.
How do they keep thin?
They starve themselves.
They're missing the point! Weight loss should be FUN! Starvation isn't FUN!
The 1980s was a time for healthy living, aerobics, and staying in shape.
Who did we turn to?
This guy.
Richard Simmons was an icon of hope, but in a FUN way...
It was FUN to tune into his show and see a blubbery women cry on his shoulder. It was FUN to see a teary-eyed man's mini-documentary proclaiming his miracle of success with weight loss.
Because before the show was over, you knew you were gonna have some FUN Sweatin' To the Oldies!
The Deal-a-Meal system, was another wonderful and FUN concept created by the curly-haired androgynous, but lovable character.
In the early 80s, FUN fitness came to the manstream via music video with Olivia Newton John's Physical. A delightful medley of sexual ennuendos and hot sweaty flesh for the US to feast their eyes on! Gym membership sales tripled in 1982 over previous years...
Jane Fonda was there to save the day, with her famous FUN videos. Her uplifting tunes, big smile, and her fashionable attire made it possible for anyone to look like they trained at the most trendy Hollywood spa.
Another icon of comingled FUN and fitness is this person:
She is not to be confused with this guy
It was...you guessed it, FUN to see this Ball Breaker live on stage telling you that eating those ding dongs after your marriage ended turned you into a whale, and to STOP THE INSANITY!
In today's world a great emphasis is placed on being thin. With this in mind,
just remember, why suffer from hunger pangs?
All you need is a little motivation, jump in your step and FUN to reach your goal of not being a butterball. Its all FUN and games til someone gets admitted to Cedars-Sinai for starving themselves!
It almost felt like this.
Then, I got to thinking...The tabloids are plastered with scrawny waifish starlets like Lindsay Lohan
Mary Kate and Nicole Ritchie.
How do they keep thin?
They starve themselves.
They're missing the point! Weight loss should be FUN! Starvation isn't FUN!
The 1980s was a time for healthy living, aerobics, and staying in shape.
Who did we turn to?
This guy.
Richard Simmons was an icon of hope, but in a FUN way...
It was FUN to tune into his show and see a blubbery women cry on his shoulder. It was FUN to see a teary-eyed man's mini-documentary proclaiming his miracle of success with weight loss.
Because before the show was over, you knew you were gonna have some FUN Sweatin' To the Oldies!
The Deal-a-Meal system, was another wonderful and FUN concept created by the curly-haired androgynous, but lovable character.
In the early 80s, FUN fitness came to the manstream via music video with Olivia Newton John's Physical. A delightful medley of sexual ennuendos and hot sweaty flesh for the US to feast their eyes on! Gym membership sales tripled in 1982 over previous years...
Jane Fonda was there to save the day, with her famous FUN videos. Her uplifting tunes, big smile, and her fashionable attire made it possible for anyone to look like they trained at the most trendy Hollywood spa.
Another icon of comingled FUN and fitness is this person:
She is not to be confused with this guyIt was...you guessed it, FUN to see this Ball Breaker live on stage telling you that eating those ding dongs after your marriage ended turned you into a whale, and to STOP THE INSANITY!
In today's world a great emphasis is placed on being thin. With this in mind,
just remember, why suffer from hunger pangs?
All you need is a little motivation, jump in your step and FUN to reach your goal of not being a butterball. Its all FUN and games til someone gets admitted to Cedars-Sinai for starving themselves!
ByLBseahag at 7:51 AM
23 Comments:
I challenge you not to mention the words Lindsay and Lohan for the next week.
See if you can do it, lol.
I think gastric bypass is fun.
Sweet! Gastric by-pass a la Crnie Wilson....too bad when she had that done, reality TV wasn't so big..it wouldve been a delight to see her scream and cry like Tocarra on Celeb Fit Club about not eating the twinkie...
Atkins people suck...Great reference, Cupcake, about them seeing Jesus...cuz they are like the holy rollers that say, "oh, I can't eat meat,"
oh, wait, those are Muslims...off the record, and I am sure I wll get hate mail for this, FUCK MUSLIMS.
There.
I said it...
Anyhoo....Richard Simmons, come back!
I can't get "Let's Get Physical" out of my mind now. That was my favorite song when I was in like 1st or 2nd grade. Wow, the memories!
Mission accomplished...
A song must always good memories...
I'm on a cig, j, and sex diet.
I'm on a cig, j, and sex diet.
I'm on a cig, j, and sex diet.
WTF?!? Did I just comment three times?
I think the IT Dept is fucking with me again. My internet has been acting up all day.
I am scared to find out what J is...
Jelly? Java? Jack Daniels?
as in...i just smoked a fat j
oh, and i forgot to mention ample amounts of chicken and mashed potatos
Seriously, I have better luck when I don't diet at all. When I do, I constantly think of food, how sad is that??
How come no one is blogging today? Where are you Jinxy?
Am I the only one with nothing to do today?
I agree...the first three letters in diet are DIE...
out here, we have a power outage, i keep getting booted off...i heard there are people stuck in elevators...
i hope its my coworkers!
did you lose power? it's all over the news.
Yes....it went off..the worst was the dumbass came on the loudspeaker and said Stay Calm...
telling me to stay calm is the last thing to do...
Is the power restored yet?
Sorry, I didn't realise that it has only been 7 minutes since you responded to Phats. I got the time a little mixed up, sorry. So I'm guessing that it is still off.
Hoping it is restored soon.
nope...what a joy, i leave in an hour to drive to Bishop, CA...traffic should be extra splendid today...
I'm on a cig, j, and sex diet.
Right on, SG!
In college, because my advisor was so not helpful the first 2, I used the "deal-a-meal" system to plan out my classes... worked for 10 quarters!
Didn't know the power was out...must be a big one, if the news is on... not one of those rolling blackouts are they?
My friend and I did the Jane Fonda Workout almost every time I spent the night there. We were a little on the "round" side, so we thought we'd exercise a little.
Funny thing is we'd poop out not even 10 minutes into it, so we'd go upstairs, cook some frozen pizzas, grab some pop (or soda for some of you), and finish the workout from the comfort of the couch.
We'd also fast-forward and rewind it and make fun of how they looked. Really pornographic when it's sped up! Not that I knew what that was back then, or now for that matter!
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